Seven of us came together
As different as different can be
Around that table sat
An abundance of diversity.
A common goal we shared
To tap into our creativity..
We came in as individuals
With ideas in our heads,
​Of what we hoped to accomplish
To help us move ahead...


Little did we know
By the end of this retreat,
Our ideas of who and what we are,
Would expand dramatically...


All our threads of differences
Began to entwine,
To form a Beautiful tapestry 
Of strength and hope, Divine...

We came as individuals 
We left there so much more....

For we discovered....

We all are writers, we all are artists
We all are coaches and we All are Believers.....
​
©lindafedroff_august20,2018

Note: Linda Fedroff and Grip McDuffie were two participants in the first Write-Publish-Promote Weekend Writer's Intensive Retreat, August 17-19, 2018 in Stoneville, NC.  We wanted to share their takes through word and art. 
​Thank you, Grip and Linda for giving voice and image to what was in our hearts after a powerful experience. We came as strangers and left as a creative tribe.

On June 27, 2018, I hit a milestone in my life.  I turned 60.   I’ve heard all kinds of stuff all with kind intention: “You look good for your age”; “Don’t worry, 60 is the new 40”; and well, you get the picture.  I am so happy and grateful to be here and know more than anything I will not grow old gracefully.  I own every bit of 60 and if I look good that has everything to do with genetics and grace, not me. 

Admittedly, I am paying more attention to my health and wellness but that is only part of my story.  I'll blog about that later. Suffice it to say I am in “no turning back” mode and I am excited about what this new decade will bring. 

First and foremost, it's bringing my very first Writer’s Intensive.  The fear and doubt that kept me from doing this sooner, propels me, today.  I am taking a small group of writers on retreat and sharing what I wish someone had told me.

When you reach a milestone, human nature has you, or at least me, feeling a bit reflective.  What have I learned in 6 decades that makes me the woman I am? I started writing and realized there may be a book in that, but I wanted to shorten it for these purposes.  (Good practice for us writers.)

So here are my six nuggets for six decades of living or what I’d prefer to call:  My 6 for 60!

1. My faith has and always will sustain me.
2. By God’s Grace I can pray and move in His Being.  That means I can make choices for His Glory and the betterment of my life and the lives of those around me.
3. My most treasured possession is the bible my parents gave me at my high school graduation.  I did the same gifting for our son.  Mine is ragged, worn and well used but it has been a guide for me. It now lives in my trucks window.
4. My only real superheroes were my parents. I was not prepared to lose them, but they prepared me to live this life leading with love and kindness.
5. My son is my greatest gift from God.  It is my honor, privilege and duty to be his mother, not his friend. (I pray he has the kind of friends in his life that have blessed and enriched mine.) By the way, God gave me a second gift: my current husband.  What that means is that my load got lighter and the joy for all of us grew exponentially especially if you include our rescue, Dora! 
6. Every experience of my life, good, bad or indifferent led me to be the woman I am today and equipped me with what I need to keep moving forward.  I live in gratitude, own my decisions and will spend my life helping others raise their game.

 
What’s your list, for the decades you’ve graced this earth?  I can’t wait to hear.  For now, I want to leave you with one more thing I heard on my birthday.  
Bill: “You know what 60 makes you, right?”
Me: “No, Sir.”
Bill: “It makes you six, perfect tens!” He smiled and sang Happy Birthday!
​I’ll take that awesome gift and challenge each of you to know how perfect you are., too  
c

​It’s both funny and a little sad how disciplined we can be with other people’s time. But when it comes to doing things for ourselves the discipline seems to take a back seat to our obligations to others.
2018 is a year of discipline for me that began long before the clock struck midnight on January 1st.  Why, because discipline takes preparation.  So I am breaking my year of discipline into 3 components, to begin when you are ready.
·         Mindset
·         Preparation
·         Practiced Change
Let’s start with mindset.  Specifically, I had to move from the “Oh well, life happens and just always seems to get in the way” mindset to the mindset that affirms that “I am primed and ready for growth both personally and professionally.”
To make it work, I have to declare everyone else’s independence.  I put the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign up and even though initially those you love will test you, as I get better at saying “Not now,” they get better at finding their own solutions.
Another trick that works really well: when they come in, give them a job and watch them get as far away from you as quickly as possible.  Okay, that didn’t work with my son, but he has turned into one awesome intern.  So, I still win.
All joking aside, changing my mindset took and continues to take preparation. I can neither over nor under book myself.
Anticipation is key.  If I anticipate needed interruptions I can either prepare to work them into my schedule or delegate the task to get it off of my plate. (We’ll talk about developing a team later.) When the unexpected happens, and it will, I have developed strategies to keep that one thing from throwing my entire schedule off.  What I don’t do is walk away from my business for reasons that I wouldn’t have taken time off from my job.
No one should have to tell me to prioritize for success and there is nothing selfish about building a better world for you and your family.  However, if this is out of your norm, you will have to practice not putting everything and everyone else before yourself and your work.  If I didn’t I’d never have published books or have a thriving client base.
Three things to remember:
·         Develop the mindset of Success: I Can, I Will, I Must!
·         Prepare and develop strategies for the interruptions that are sure to come
·         Practice putting value on you and the work you are destined to accomplish.
Happy Mindset Shift, y’all!

 
I envy people who say they can work anywhere including a simple corner of the kitchen counter.
That is certainly not me. If I work in the kitchen I see all the things I really need to clean; not to mention the fact that that proximity to the fridge is like inviting a moth to the flame.
It doesn’t have to be much, but it needs walls, a window and a door, separate from the men I love and the distractions that would keep me from ever producing and creating.
 
My coaching clients initially find it strange that I ask about their personal work space.  Mainly because most have never been asked or thought about it before. 

Once they do, the flood gates open and they realize, as I did, that personal work space offers the boost needed for changing your level of engagement.  
My must haves:

• ·         A work space that smells and looks the way I want.  (In my case, that is a wonderful blend of books and candles.)
• ·         A place to put my feet up
• ·         A window
• ·         Dedicated technology and a place for all my tools for the trade. 
• ·         A beautiful rug for days I want to work on the floor.
• ·         Enough separation from my home, that I don’t hear doorbells and household noise
• ·         A doggie bed for my favorite office mate

When we bought our home, our contractor turned a utility room in our garage into my perfect space. I get to leave my living space and get the feel of leaving home, minus the commute.

What are your must haves? If your office is in your home, might I suggest facing your desk away from your living space, that is away from the things that remind you of dusting and vacuuming.

Investing in your work space is not selfish.  In fact, I find it a loving gesture to myself, making me much more focused and energized when I move out of my bubble and onto a more public stage.  It is comforting to know that when I am finished, I can return to my place of respite. 

Experts often talk about the benefits of personal space.  I am a proponent although there are also times that I choose to be in a shared workspace.  Sometimes I need to have noise (to tune out) around me. That’s the old journalist in me that got used to loud newsrooms.  I am especially fond of coffee shops for that reason even though I’ve never had a cup of coffee. 
My point is this:  Create an atmosphere of choice so that you have space to build and breathe life into the business you want or the stories you want to tell.